Tuesday, 24 June 2008


Isn't it about time the world stop feigning this outrage over the problems in Zimbabwe? Let's be honest here, no one - NO ONE - gives a shit about Mugabe rigging these elections. No one cares about him threatening his own people with violence unless they vote for him. No one cares about him using food supplies as a tool to remain in power. No one cares about him 'disputing' a democratic election and then having a 'run off'. No one cares about him imprisoning political adversaries. Governments, politicians, the UN, NATO or any of the major corporations that control the West behind the scenes care about the plight of the Zimbabwean people.

If you think I'm wrong, consider this; the US Government has overthrown countless communist and socialist democracies in Central and South America in order to install "democratic" governments. The moment Slobodan Milosovic became a little too big for his boots in Yugoslavia, NATO and the UN stepped in. The second Hitler started killing Polish allies instead of Czechoslovakian peasents something needed to be done. And need I remind you of the current Middle Eastern Holiday, that was executed partly under the premise of removing a dictator from power. Governer Bush and co have left the option on the table about whether to go to Iran and do the same thing (depending on whether or not they get the bomb).

But what have we had in response to the crisis in Zimbabwe? Strongly worded letters, tellings off, disgruntled statements and grumblings. Even South Africa, a continent sharing neighbour, has only issued statements. No one in the UN has motioned for military action. They, Amnesty and the Red Cross have requested permission to view the election to ensure they are run fairly. Did anyone ask Hugo Chavez for this privelage? Did anyone send a strongly worded letter to Saddam Hussein?

No one felt the need to bother the House of Saud, the royal family that rules Saudi Arabia with an iron fist, denying its people a free vote, personal or religious freedom or the right to a fair trial. Maybe when they agreed to supply all their oil to Western countries at a fair price we just forgot to put them on the list of people that need to be dealt with. Just a hunch.

Equitorial Guinea - one of the samllest countries on the continent - was on that list though. The country with the smallest population in all of Africa is worthy of an attempted coup partly financed by the son of one of Britain's most powerful Prime Ministers. I wonder why that could be? Maybe it's because a nice, controlled Central African nation would be the perfect place for a jolly good holiday. No, that's not it. There are better, more exhilarating African countires than that to vacation in. Perhaps it's got something to do with the large petroleum reserves that were recently discovered there. Just a hunch.

So let's stop the pretence. No one cares about the plight of Zimbabweans. No one cares about the plight of coloured people, period. If they've got nothing to exploit, they've got nothing worth risking Western lives for. There are still plenty of coloured people with plenty of stuff to steal that still need to be killed. Remember folks, unless countries have something worth exploiting and controlling (or unless the population is white and Christian) the rest of the world really doesn't give a shit.

And what's the point of seatbelts in airplanes? Are we meant to believe that when a 300 ton tube of steel loaded with several thousand gallons of highly combustible liquid slams into earth at 500 miles per hour that a canvas belt strapped over your lap is going to save your life? Might work in a car, not in a plane. Danger, people. It's everywhere. Don't kid yourself about the illusions of safety.

Monday, 23 June 2008

RIP George Carlin. May 12 1937 - June 22 2008

No other comedian – living or recently dead – has influenced me, my worldview or my thought process more than George Carlin. No one has entertained me more, made me think, made me laugh and made me question things more than George Carlin. In my honest opinion, George Carlin is the greatest comedian I have ever seen. Topical, surreal, humorous, thought provoking, controversial, confrontational and dangerous.

He has nailed everything from religion:



Global warming:



The human condition:





The American Dream:

And of course, profanity:

And has done it in a ball bustingly hilarious fashion. Please, watch the above videos. You will laugh, smile and think. No one has ever done it better. Ever. The world is a far less funny place without him.

“The most unfair thing about life is the way it ends. I mean, life is tough. It takes up a lot of your time. What do you get at the end of it? A Death! What’s that, a bonus? I think the life cycle is all backwards. You should die first, get it out of the way. Then you live in an old age home. You get kicked out when you're too young, you get a gold watch, you go to work. You work forty years until you're young enough to enjoy your retirement. You do drugs, alcohol, you party, you getr eady for high school. You go to grade school, you become a kid, you play, you have no responsibilities, you become a little baby, you go back into the womb, you spend your last nine months floating… And you finish off as an orgasm.”

RIP George. You will be sorely missed.